Social conditioning teaches us the false notion that when we acquire certain things or achieve or do certain things is when we can finally be happy. This leads people to chase after material possessions, after social approval, after different things in hopes of reaching fulfillment, happiness, and completion. The reality is you are already complete and you should embrace that and be happy now.
“After I make X amount of money I’ll be good. After I get a girlfriend I’ll be happy. After I get the approval of my friends, family, boss, that attractive person, society, then I’ll be happy. After I get the house, car, body, lifestyle of my dreams, then I’ll be fulfilled.” This is what it sounds like to chase completion. It drives people to develop a compulsive need for external validation that becomes a never-ending black hole.
It isn’t uncommon for people to spend significant portions of their lives stuck in similar loops, where they are continually attempting to find their self-worth and their happiness in the external and the physical. Typically these people will go through a midlife crisis or will reach a late stage in their life and realize that they are full of regret from having spent so much time focused on the wrong things.
Here’s the truth:
You are already complete. You are already whole. You are already awesome.
Fulfillment, appreciation, and true happiness can only be found internally and in the present moment.
The mere fact that you were given the gift of life and given the opportunity to be you is what should make you love yourself and feel awesome.
You don’t need other people’s approval or their permission to feel good. Let go of that need for external validation and instead feel amazing from simply being the person that you want to be.
Don’t take life so seriously. Laugh more, be silly, be weird. Allowing yourself to be free, to express freely, to enjoy each moment for what it brings, and to be your authentic self is where fulfillment and joy will be found.
When people go their entire lives chasing validation and chasing completion, they’ll often times realize that fulfillment, what they truly wanted, was right in front of them all along. They will regret that they didn’t enjoy and appreciate their life more, didn’t share more experiences and good emotions with the people they love, and that they didn’t ever fully allow themselves to be unstifled, expressive, and free from outcome. Instead they spent their lives trying to impress others, not step on anyone’s toes, and gain their approval.
Happiness appears as this thing that is reached in the future, after all our problems have been solved. This is socially conditioned thinking. The truth is peace and happiness can be found right now in this moment. Allow yourself to be able to sit still, to accept and appreciate reality, and to feel love for yourself and those around you. You are already whole and you are already awesome.